the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
