So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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