the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
