I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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