Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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