I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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