Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
