thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize