thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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