I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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