and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
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