Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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