She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
