Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
