I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
