Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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