I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
