honey bunches of taint.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
