Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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