GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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