idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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