Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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