Define "chronic" masturbator.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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