if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
