Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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