You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize