Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
