But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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