But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Acid is not a monday night drug
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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