so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
