At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
