Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
handjob tips. give me some.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
