We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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