so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
