I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
