He had one of those small greek statue penises
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
