What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
