There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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