I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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