he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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