he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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