I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
