I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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