my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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