the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's never too late to be topless.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I didn't notice because vodka
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
