dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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