And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
