This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
A+ Viking dick
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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