So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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