just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
